Monday, July 16, 2012

Mini Meltdown


  I have to admit that last week ended on a bad note for me. Everything is fine, I was just all sorts of frustrated with something. Isn’t Sunday supposed to be the start of a new week? Someone or thing might want to tell my body that, because I continued on with my frustration from the last couple of days. I did damage to myself, and it’s all my fault.

  A couple of years ago the interest rates for buying a house were so low that the Charmed One and I said, “Let’s do it!” Now, for the record, the Charmed One would have been happy with a condo, or townhome. But nooo! Kelly wanted land. She wanted to be able to plant many, many things, wherever she chose. So we found a nice home on 2.2 acres of land. It had a little potting shed, a large vegetable garden, and a huge, huge, yard. It was everything that she was looking for. Right?

  (My switch from first to third person sometimes scares me!)

  Well, within the first few months I realized just how big the yard truly was. If I jumped on my riding mower and mowed straight through it took me almost three hours. Since then we bought another mower and with both of us mowing it cut the time in half. The vegetable garden, we learned, was probably big enough to feed all of Podunk. It was big.

  So let me add another thing here. I am the outdoor freak. My paying job is an outdoor job. I love all sorts of nature. The Charmed One is the indoor type. Although the Charmed One helps with anything I may need outdoors it is usually all mine. It is my blank canvas. I did not plant any vegetables this spring. I instead took a part of that large garden and made it into a Kelly garden. I planted a couple of blueberry and blackberry bushes and surrounded them with various perennials and shrubs. I mulched and mulched, and then I ran out of mulch. I got more. It has been in the back of our pickup truck for weeks now.

  Today was the day I was going to finish mulching everything. I started out early. Needless to say one thing turned into another and there is still mulch in the bed of the truck. I texted the Charmed One (who was working) and stated I was getting a for sale sign. I got a nice text back asking if I didn’t like the house anymore. That turned into a two page(?) text back. To make a long story short-I HAD A MINI MELTDOWN! I had major complaints about only having so much done in the three and a half hours I had been outside. I complained about my body hurting and the tears that were forming in my eyes. I complained that I hadn’t even got on the mower yet. I complained that I didn’t go shopping yet. I had a tremendous feeling of being overwhelmed and I let it get the best of me.

  A little while later Charmed One pulled into the driveway. We mowed the lawn together. As we finished the belt broke on my mower. I closed my eyes and shook my head. Tears were threatening again. I came in, ate some ice creamJ, and showered. I felt so horrible when I got out of the shower I had to lay down. I literally had no energy. It took all my might to get out of bed. I felt nauseous. I had hurt myself, and it won’t happen again. Sadly, I realized I am too old for this stuff!

Have you ever regretted a big decision that you made? Have you literally worked yourself until you couldn’t take it any longer? Is your luck anything like mine?    

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