Thursday, May 30, 2013

Zodiac Signs

  The other day I was hanging out at the Charmed One’s little shop. I had my feet up on the desk with a notebook on my lap trying to get some writing done. Suddenly a customer came in and started looking around at some merchandise. This guy was probably in his early to mid twenties. When he walked by me I smiled and said hello, noting his intent stare.

This is a mood ring. Mine looks nothing like that. 
  Now, the Charmed One was elsewhere at the time so I slowly pulled my legs off the desk and sat like a normal person. After a minute the young man came back and smiled at me. 

Our strange conversation from that point went like this…

Young Man: “Is that a mood ring?”

Me: Look at my finger and smile. *Clueless* “No, I got this ring while visiting Mexico a few years ago.” Holds out hand for young man to see.

Young Man: “Oh. So, it’s not a wedding band?”

Me: Still clueless. (Come on now, its been a while!) “No, it isn’t a wedding band.”

Young Man: “What is your name?”

Me: Watching the Charmed One off in the distance. “My name is Kelly.”

Young Man: “That’s a pretty name. What is your sign?”

Me: *Befuddled* “My sign?” Honestly I couldn’t believe someone was asking me this. He nods his head so I answer. “I’m an Aries.”

Young Man: Instantly takes two steps back. “Woa. Oh no, that’s not good. I’m an Aquarius. We don’t get along well.”

Me: On the outside my eyebrows are raised as this young man starts explaining his sign to me. Or should I say tries to explain his sign through a series of hand gestures and dips of his shoulder. There may even have been some feet scuffling in there as well. On the inside I’m in shock and trying to hide a smile. I peer over the young man’s shoulder and glare at the Charmed One, who openly wears a huge grin from about ten feet away. I let the young man finish his story of Aquarius being misunderstood. I felt odd because I really didn’t have much to say. Finally I asked him his name.

Young Man: “Oh, my name is Juan. I guess I’ll be going. It was nice to meet you.”

Me: Smiling. “It was nice meeting you too, Juan.” I watched the polite young man walk out of the store as the Charmed One walked up to me laughing.

  That conversation went something like this…

Me: “That’s not funny. I think he just hit on me.”

Charmed One: “You think? The way he was dipping and fluttering reminded me of the mating ritual of that male Cardinal in the driveway that you pointed out the other day.”


  There you have it. My story of getting hit on until my astrological sign was revealed. *sigh* I have to say that I have scared a couple of men away before, but not because of my sign!

  What is your sign? Do you understand the zodiac signs? What is the strangest way you have been hit on/flirted with?

W.P.I. - One of the easiest ways to conserve water in your garden is to plant as many drought tolerant plants as you can. Drought tolerant plants need regular watering while they are getting established for their first year in your garden. After that, they will live with little more than what Mother Nature Provides. Some examples of drought tolerant perennials include Black Eyed Susan, Russian Sage, Coreopsis, Coneflower, and Yarrow.


Monday, May 27, 2013

Remembering Heroes

  Here in the United States today is known as Memorial Day. It is a holiday where we honor and thank the men and women that have given their lives to protect our freedoms. It is our day of remembrance. 

  Many towns hold parades, many stores have special sales. Families have cookouts, grilling their favorite foods, feasting until they can't eat anymore. Many consider Memorial Day the beginning of summer and observe that. However you choose to celebrate please remember that we wouldn't be where we are if it wasn't for those that gave up their lives. 

  I'm thankful today, and every day, for the men and women who so selflessly gave themselves in the name of our country. We can have our picnics, we can go shopping, we can live our lives without much fear thanks to you. 

  The sacrifices you and your families have made should serve as a reminder to us all that freedom is nothing to take lightly.

  Thank you.

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Your Possum Is Ready

  Yes, you read that title correctly. Did you miss it? Let me type it again. ‘Your possum is ready.’ Obviously there is a story to go with it. And for all of you, who laugh when I say I live in Podunk, breathe this in, read up, and let it absorb. After you’ve done that we’ll discuss whether or not I’m over exaggerating. So, without further ado, I present you the story about the “possum.”

  The Charmed One has a side business, and every once in a while we’ll place an ad in the Charlotte or Hickory Craigslist alerting people to said business. The Charmed One has this ad set up with a Google phone number for people who have inquiries. Tuesday the Charmed One’s phone rang. The strange ring tone told us it was from the Google number. Before Charmed could answer it went to voice mail. Now Google tries its darnedest to translate the message that is being left, but Google is not set up to handle a southern drawl. Many times the translations are hilarious and not even close to what the person actually said. Enter the message left yesterday…

  “Yea, this is Ronnie. Your possum is ready so if you want I can meet you. Give me a call. But it’s ready.”

  Obviously we thought for sure Google Voice just couldn’t translate the slang, but we both got a chuckle out of the translation. Wouldn’t you know when we listened to the actual message it did say that your possum is ready? Now we are rolling on the floor. The Charmed One’s side business has nothing to do with whatever this person is talking about.

  I scratched my head. What does that mean, your possum is ready? Is this person a taxidermist? If so, who gets an opossum stuffed? I mean they are not the cutest animal in the world.

  A short time later that same number called again. This time the Charmed One answered and told Ronnie he had the wrong number. After hanging up the Charmed One stood with a big grin. “We heard him correctly. Someone’s possum is ready!”

  I rolled my eyes. To each his own, but this was just funny. And yes, this is Podunk. Sometimes I swear weird stuff just finds its way to me.

What would be worse, a possum or this?
  Enter Wednesday. The Charmed One’s phone rang once more with that same number. Once again the Charmed One answered and talked to this possum man. This time Ronnie the Possum Man inquired about something actually related to Charm’s business. After talking for a minute Ronnie recognized the Charmed One’s voice.

  Once the Charmed One hung up the laughs kept coming. Come to find out Ronnie is a sculptor. He had sculpted a possum for a client and must have been confusing the phone numbers. After everything got straightened out The Charmed One got an order from Ronnie the Possum Sculptor.

  Now, do you see the Podunk thing? Honestly. And who wants a sculpture of an opossum? J

  Have you received any strange phone calls lately? What’s the oddest conversation you’ve had recently? Do you think opossum’s are sculpture worthy? Do you believe me now that I live in Podunk?

W.P.I. - Plan your herb garden by grouping herbs according to light, irrigation, and soil requirements. Most herbs enjoy full sun, but a few tolerate shade. Be aware of the growth habits of the plants before you purchase them. Some herbs, such as borage, anise, caraway, chervil, coriander, cumin, dill, and fennel, should be direct-seeded, because they grow easily from seed or do not transplant well. Other herbs, such as mints, oregano, rosemary, thyme, and tarragon, should be purchased as plants and transplanted or propagated by cuttings to ensure production of the desired plant (do not come true from seeds).

Monday, May 20, 2013

World Of Whiskers

  It was probably inevitable that I would rant about this topic sooner or later. I mean everywhere you look you can find one of these. Some are thick, some thin. Some are long, some short. Some are full, some... well... some just are lacking. Whether we like it or not, no matter where we look these days, we'll find men with beards.
  I was at The Goddess Blogs the other day and the author blogging was talking about hot words of 2013. She went through a few and at the end she told of a word she believed would become hot, and soon. The word is hirsute. It means covered with hair, and is commonly used to mean facial hair. The little blurb she wrote about beards had an impact in many replies to her questions. I just smiled a little smile and thought to myself that hirsute men may be a good blog topic in and of itself. 

  Personally I do have to admit that I'm not big on beards at all. I cannot remember my father without one. I do see a picture floating around here and there of him minus the facial flash, but I couldn't tell you if he has dimples, or high cheekbones. Personally I have no idea what he looks like under his neatly trimmed beard. So when this trend started my palm instantly met my forehead. I wanted to scream. 

  As time as gone on though I have found a few that look wonderful in beards. 

  It's hockey playoff time. That means many, many beards. Like this...
Henrik Lundqvist, New York Ranger goalie. *sigh*
Or if you are not into hockey...

Hugh... *double sigh*

And then there are those that have a hard time. The poor guys, don't they know not everyone can pull it off?

Of course there is always one or two in every crowd that just can't help themselves...

Not to be outdone...

So we have good beards and humorous beards. Next we have someone that should NEVER EVER EVER even think of growing one again.

No offense Mr. Pitt, but I can't end a blog with that picture. So last but not least here is a
very nice beard...


  Of course he could make horns protruding from the head look good!

    There you have it. My blog about beards. Some are skimpy, some are funny, and some actually do look nice. I guess. In a why-are-you-hiding-that-face sort of way. It's a fad I hope goes as quickly as it came. I just have a feeling I better get used to it!

  What do you think of beards? Do you like a lot of hair? Who sports a good beard? Who shouldn't even try to grow one? Are you watching the hockey playoffs? :)

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Toss And Turn

  A few weeks back I wrote one of these blogs called 'Sleepless in Podunk.' If you didn't read it I tell how sleep and I are not good friends anymore. Here's an update... Sleep and I are not on speaking terms. I've tried to reason with it, but in the end I've come to realize that sleep is irrational. Sleep continues to play with my mind and body. It's not a fun playing either. So for that I've just tried to ignore its taunts. I get anywhere from one to three hours of shut eye before it starts. Then I lay there. And lay there. And lay there. Various things run through my mind. None are real happy thoughts. And heaven forbid that I try to think of something happy. That lasts until I feel myself dozing then WHAM-O, I hear that devilish laugh in my ear. It is sleep, taunting, laughing, and heckling me. I'm awake. I'm awake. I toss. I turn. I sigh. I contemplate getting up. But that would really be letting the little PITA win, wouldn't it? So I sigh some more. Bunch my pillow some more. Listen to the dogs snores some more. After at least an hour I usually will fall back asleep. 
  With that being said I needed to find some funny in my life. The lack of sleep makes me cranky. Even the dogs look at me like I'm part zombie. So I searched some pics I had saved, and I found some new ones. I hope you like. Because I'm all about you liking this blog. :)

  Without further ado here's my compilation of (what I think are) funny pics.

What did she do?
A wee bit o kilt humor!
We could do a caption this for this one.
Frog romance?
And last but not least...

No explanation required, right?

  There you have it. Those are some of my funnies that I have accumulated throughout the past couple months. I hope you enjoyed them!

  Do you suffer from broken sleep? Which one of these is your favorite pics? If you had to caption the bird one what would you say? Do you think the turtle gets offended by being called slow?

W.P.I.- Whether you have acres of land or a small garden, hungry deer can always be a problem! Deer have already invaded some of my perennials that they have not bothered in the past. Maybe it is because my neighbor and I both have yet to put in our vegetables, who knows. It is frustrating either way. One deterrent to deer is dog hair. I'm going to ask my groomer to save some of the extra fur and sprinkle it throughout my beds. Deer also don't care for marigolds. I am on my way to splattering them throughout my beds as well. There are also sprays available to deter deer. The only way we learn is by experimenting, right?

Monday, May 13, 2013

Ink Or Leather?

  Every once in a while I get what some would call a crazy idea in my head. Actually it happens more than every once in a while, just ask my family or friends. Now sometimes my crazy turns out pretty smart, although I can’t think of any examples of it at the moment. You’ll just have to trust me! Really! ;)

  Sometimes my crazy turns out to be just that. Crazy. One time I thought that turning a ceramic urn upside down so I could quickly step on it to re-hang some Christmas lights was a good idea. Twelve stitches in my leg and a chipped bone in my foot later told me it wasn’t really a good idea. That time I got a little too close to my parents sliding glass door with the weedwacker… that was a crazy idea. Do I have to go on to make my point? I do have a few more of those stories, but I may just hold on to them for a while yet. I honestly think you get the picture.

  I've wanted something for a while now. I keep rolling the idea over in my head. Some may think it’s another one of my crazy ideas. Not me though. Until recently. I added something and made it an either or deal. What is it you ask?  

  Well… I've wanted another tattoo, but I want this one to be unique. So I've been taking my time and gathering ideas here and there. I still haven’t come up with the exact one I want yet. Here are some I am taking bits and pieces from.
Possibly, but a little big. And I'd like a butterfly instead of a dragonfly.

Eh. Maybe something similar. But I'd like color.
Not a sleeve, but I like the butterfly and flower it is on.
  Then, I got the brilliant idea. That light bulb appeared over my head one day. While I thought it was an excellent idea the others at the table looked cross eyed at me. One of those looks like I had grown another head. I don’t know where the thought came from, and I do believe it is crazy. I opened my mouth and the following words fell out… “I’m getting either a tattoo or a motorcycle!”

  Yes. There you have it. Crazy idea number 4382. Have I ever driven a motorcycle before in my life? Oh heck no. But I know I can. :/ The other day this arrived in the mail. It fits perfect and has the extra protection in the elbows and shoulders. What do ya think?

   Okay, okay. Before my mom comes here and reads this I have to fess up. Yes, I would love a motorcycle, but I do value my life. I know my luck when it comes to certain things. I am the one that a deer ran into while riding my four wheeler one night. One second sooner and I would've been hurt. I’m also the one who flipped my parents SUV years ago. If I have a hard time with four wheels how well do you think I’d do with two? That jacket is for The Charmed One's business, and it just happened to fit like a glove. Coincidence? 

  Tattoo it is. Once I get the right one in my mind. Hopefully that crazy mind can come up with the perfect one soon.

  What are some crazy ideas you have had? Did any result in injury? Do you have any tattoos, or a motorcycle? Care to share what it may be of?

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Happy Mom's Day!

Sometimes it's better to ask for forgiveness than permission!

   She’s the one who brought you into the world. She’s the one who coddled and swaddled you. She acted as your nurse, teacher, and best friend. She has seen you through the good times and bad, through life’s ups and downs. I don’t know how you feel about it, but I don’t know where I’d be if it wasn’t for my mother!

  My mom taught me to tie my shoes, my abc’s and 1,2,3’s. She taught me right from wrong, and that two wrongs don’t make a right. She picked me up when I fell down, cheered when I ran the fastest. Through each of my heartbreaks she held me close and taught me that life will go on. She shook her head with my refusal to wear dresses, and put up with my tomboyish ways.

  When I was my ugliest she was most patient. And that was a lot. Like all those years when I thought I was always right, when indeed I was nothing but a teenager. When I was hurt she was right there with whatever I might need. She guided me, taught me patience (which took years to sink in), and most importantly loved me for me.

  The years my mom was all into flowers and plants and I would quickly turn and run in the other direction. It seemed like as soon as I moved out of state I found a new interest in those plants. I’m sure that probably frustrated her, but she would never say so. At times I thought if I were her I’d want to kill me. She tried to teach me to cook. She was once named the Betty Crocker Homemaker of the Year, an accolade that would run far and fast away from me, but I did learn the secret stuffing recipe that I will make sure my nieces know as well.

  I hope one day I can be half the woman she is. She is one of my best friends, and like all those years she would do anything for me, I would do anything for her. I am fortunate to have a mother like her, and glad a part of me is from her.

  To all the mothers out there… Happy Mother’s Day!

  Cherish this day, and all others. Don’t ever forget that we love you!

  Do you have plans for the big day? What is the best Mother’s Day present you've given/received?

W.P.I. - One-fourth of the flower and plant purchases made for holidays occur at Mother's Day, according to the Society of American Florists. Fresh flowers accounted for 63 percent of the purchases. Another 35 percent were in the form of outdoor bedding and garden plants, and 22 percent were flowering houseplants. Another 12 percent of the overall purchases were for green, indoor houseplants.

Monday, May 6, 2013

Your Turn

  So each and every week you get to learn about who I am through these “rants” as I call them. Yes, I knew that’s what I had to do when I started this. No, I am not complaining. I like doing these blogs actually. I look for things in my daily life that I could possibly write about that may interest you. Some blogs are themed, like for exercise, or food. Not mine though, nooo. I blog about anything and everything. And, for the most part, I have no idea what interests you.

  I try to be funny. I do this for many reasons. First of all it’s sometimes hard to find humor in the world. Secondly, I think I am funny. For the most part. Not comedian funny, but a cross between smart-ass funny and witty. Do I come off that way? Knowing my luck, no. But I try!

  I digress. Enough about me. It’s time to hear about you. Yes, that’s right. I’m going to try to get you to talk to me again. The silence is deafening my peeps! Today I’m asking you questions about one of my favorite topics… YOU! I want to know more about the people that come here and make me smile by reading these rants. Tell me about yourselves. Please? *Yes, that was a beg!*

  So, let me ask a few questions, and maybe I’ll answer a few as well. Okay? Stay with me here!

1       1)      What do you do to relax?
2)     Do you exercise? What is your favorite                              exercise?
3)     In what part of the world do you live? Were you born there, or a transplant?
4)     If you could travel to anywhere in the world where would you go?
5)     Do you have any pets? Varieties and        names please!
6)     Do you have kids? How many?
7)     What book are you reading right now?
8)    Name one or two of your favorite authors.

  See, not that hard, right? And since there is no right or wrong answers how can you not participate? :)

  I’ll start it off to ease your nerves a little…

          1)     I read and write to relax.
2)     I do exercise, but not like I should. I like hiking.
3)     I’m in North Carolina, transplanted from New York.
4)     Ireland. Ireland. Ireland.
5)     I have two Cavalier King Charles Spaniels (featured in a couple other rants.)
      Their names are Alexis and Savannah.
6)     My dogs are my kids!
7)     I’m reading Barefoot, by Elin Hilderbrand.
8)    I love both Jill Shalvis and Barbara Samuel/Barbara O’Neal.

  See, that wasn’t hard, was it? Now it's up to you. Will I hear crickets? Or will I get to know some of the wonderful people that come read my rants? 

Thursday, May 2, 2013

New Look Bad Boys

*This blog is for the girls... And the toughest of men!*

  I was brought up to abide by the rules, to obey the laws. For the most part I have done that, only crossing the lines every so often. By crossing the line I mean that speeding ticket I got a few years ago,    Oh the heck with it!

  That's right. I'm not beating around the bush today. I'm getting right to the point because I'm feeling bad in the best of ways. Let me just say that if villains are this good looking write me off of the good girl list. I want to be baaad. In every sense! I mean... If this is televisions new face of villains I'm in love.

How about this one...

From the same show comes this guy... *wipes drool from chin*

Or here's another... 

  Well, maybe the pictures don't do them justice. Trust me when I tell you the two main men from the cast of Rogue (found on DirecTV channel 239(Audience), Wednesday, 9:00) are two VERY, VERY good villains. (Word of caution, if you tune in be prepared. It seems there is one scene in each show that is not suitable for children. I blushed, then remembered my mother was watching too, then blushed some more!)

  If those two don't do it for you let me give you a peak at a couple more bad men. You can find these jaw droppers on ABC's Red Widow, Sunday night, 10:00. The first guy they killed off just twenty minutes into the first show. That was unfortunate because I was liking what I was seeing.

  Since he was wrote off so fast I knew something else had to be coming, and boy was it!

Oh... Yes please. I can be really bad with you!

  If he doesn't do it for you there are a couple others that aren't bad on the eyes, but I find this next one to have a certain amount of appeal.

  I don't know what ever happened to villains that were scarred, weathered, gangly, or just uneasy on the eyes. Honestly, I don't care. I think someone is onto something here. I always thought I was the hero type, but maybe my inner, dark, bad girl is ready to come out and join these bad guys!

  Do you watch any shows where the villain is good looking? Do you watch either of these shows? What villain do you think should be portrayed by a good looking man?

Weekly Planting Information (W.P.I.) - One of the best things about annuals is their incredible diversity and versatility. Using them allows you to compose really exciting combinations of color, form and texture that will last all season long. Colors range from bright  to subtle.

You can also select annuals for your garden based on characteristics other than flower color. There are annuals that are tall, medium, short or climbing; ones that prefer either full sun or partial shade; and those with special virtues, such as delightful fragrance or attractive foliage. 

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