To Be Read Pile

            I haven’t read a book in months, and this makes me very sad. Very sad. And a little on the grumpy side. You see, I need my escape. I need my mind to travel far and wide. Over the past couple few months it has only trekked twenty miles a day. That was back and forth to work. Now, finally, I will get to escape once again.

            Our hours at work are about to get cut. Now we will go back to a four day work week, instead of five and sometimes six. You can’t see me now, but I am doing a little happy dance. (And I look like a geek. But oh well. J) Those 50-60 hour work weeks were fine for the bank account, but not for my body, or the things I love to do, like read, write, or just enjoy time with the family. Now it is time for me to get back to making my final revisions, seeking out agents to send queries to. And the dreaded query.

            It is time for me to reacquaint myself to J.A. Redmerski’s The Edge of Always. I started that book two months ago. Two.Months.Ago. I’m embarrassed to admit that. What kind of writer am I if I’m not reading? I haven’t been. I’ve been the horticulturalist. Thankfully soon enough I will be able to go back to doing both.

            That is a good thing considering Bookbub emails me specials every day. If you've never been I suggest you give it a whirl here...https://www.bookbub.com/home/ For quite a while I was on a kick of buying at least two books a week. Now is the time I can catch up. Finally I will be able to read Robyn Carr’s Four Friends that B&N had on sale for half off this past weekend. Now I will be able to catch up on my friend Barbara Samuel/Lark O’Neill’s latest that I’ve been chomping on the bit to crack open. And after all of those I will dive into the latest from Jill Shalvis, Then Came You, coming out on July 1.

            Of course it will be well after July 1 that I get to that one. I mean, I’m still working four 10 hour days. And I’m a slow reader. With a TBR pile as big as mine I should be good to go for about a year!

            When your life is hectic, what do you miss, or not have time for? Have you ever heard of Bookbub? How big is your TBR pile? What are you reading at the moment?

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About Dance Kids and Makeup

      I've been having a hard time recently deciding what I want to rant about. My life has been busy with work, but nothing much else. So, when all else fails, go to your favorite pizza place! Did I lose you? Sorry. 

      I learned a very valuable lesson the other night. If I'm ever in a writing slump all I have to do is go to my favorite pizza shop and many stories will come to me. I've been known to enter, place order, and put pen to paper. Some times the words flow so freely that I don't want to leave. Fortunately I live only a few blocks away, so my creative flow doesn't really get interrupted.  Luckily.

      For example, I didn't have much to talk about for this blog. Charmed and I went out on Tuesday night, knowing it wouldn't be very busy, and BAM, suddenly stories emerged. First of all we had to wait for a table. Why? There was some sort of dance competition going on. Which brings up my first story...

      WHY, IN THE HELL, DO THESE PARENTS CAKE MAKEUP ONTO THEIR CHILDREN FOR A DANCE COMPETITION? I don't understand. These children are on stage, with a reasonable distance between them and the audience. IMO there is no reason for all of this unnecessary adultness to be added to a child. People are supposed to be watching the dance, not the faces, right? Am I wrong? Am I missing something? I used to take ballet lessons, and never once did any of the girls wear pounds of makeup. Not for a competition. Not for a recital. NOT. EVER. What makes these young girls different?

      Has anyone ever seen Mikhail Baryshnikov? He is one of the best dancers I've ever seen. And his face has many blemishes. He is a man of many talents, not just ballet. He may wear makeup when he performs, but he is a grown man. A Grown Man. Not a 6-10 year old girl. There is such a thing as appropriate. And I am a firm believer that caking a seven year old with five pounds of makeup is very inappropriate. How does that even help ones self esteem? 

      To me, nothing says that you think your child is ugly by applying pounds of makeup to them. When they look back to those pictures or videos what do you think they will think? I know I'd be saying, "Why did you make me look like an adult when I was only a child?"

      Yes, this has me riled up. Yes I think its wrong. Yes I think there are many things wrong with this whole thing. And it has me thinking that it is the parents who need their heads examined. Because I think it is totally wrong to do this to a child. 

      I really don't think there is a worse example of a way a parent can demean their child. They might not realize it at the time, but trust me, they will later on down the road.

      I'm getting down off my soapbox now. And by the way, I'm thinking of changing the name of this blog to 'Rants Chants, or Rant Chat. What do you think?

      Have you ever seen a dance child? Am I wrong? Do you encourage your children to participate in extra curricular activities?

False Advertising?

  False advertisement, to me, is advertising a product to be able to do something specific, and then that product does not live up to expectation, or the product fails to deliver what was specifically stated it would. Now, if I were to look up the definition I’m sure there would be some fancy thirty page legal definition that would basically cover every manufacturers arse, because really there are so many products that don’t live up to expectation it is ridiculous. Can you tell what I am going to talk about today? That’s right. I’m going to talk about two products that are epic failures in my eyes. These two products have somehow made their way into this universe and continue to sell even though they do not live up to what is advertised.

  Just so you know I know there are many products out there that are far from expectation. I’m just telling you these two because they absolutely put every piece of patience I have to use. These two products, no matter how well meaning, or how “good” they are for us make me want to pull my hair out. One by one. So without further ado…

  Product 1:

  Saran Wrap/Cling Wrap

  Every time I need to use this product I have to practice breathing slowly. My hands shake as I open the cupboard door to retrieve it. A box of band aid’s are on hand because I always, always manage to cut myself on the jagged teeth that have no problem cutting my skin, but all the problems in the world cutting said cling wrap. The box states “Easy to Handle Wrap.” Huh. I think that’s just cra… ! After I finally tackle getting a piece of this product from hell cut it automatically suctions itself to my hand. Here’s another problem. I need it to cover a bowl, not my hand. So then I have both band aids and cling wrap covering me, when I would like uncut fingers and my food covered. When I finally get part of the wonderful cling wrap to stick to whatever I need it to go on I start to breathe a sigh of relief. Until I get the rest on. Then it inevitably seems to lose its so called “cling.” Supposedly this product keeps your food fresh longer. This only happens when it is on airtight. 

  Product 2:

  Energy Efficient/Extra Long Life Light Bulbs

  Before you get mad at me for this one just listen to my complaint first. I have no qualms whatsoever about trying to make a better world, or making things better for our environment, and making us less reliant on so many things. My complaint is this. This box clearly states that these bulbs last 9 years or 10,000 hours. Do you want to know how long the last one lasted that I just replaced? A year and a half. It was in the bathroom. Not a room that has many hours of use. One other complaint about this is… what the heck are you supposed to do with them when they do go bad before their 9 years of use? These “new wave” light bulbs contain mercury. Our beautiful country rushes them onto the market without giving thought to where to dispose of them when they don’t live up to their advertised longevity. Maybe they thought they had nine years to figure it out???

  Just sayin! This is my rant for today. I intended nothing but laughs from it, and hope it gave you one or two!

  Do you have a product that you believe could be false advertisement? What product do you hate to deal with? Do you have any hints on how to better deal with the cling wrap, or where to dispose of those light bulbs?

 

    

Lol

      Every now and then I run across things that make me chuckle. They may show my personality, like this...

This is a daily occurrence. ;)

      And that is a true statement. And it seems all of those people seek me out. I just must look like their type. Lol.

      This next one I just find true. And funny.

      Finally, this last one happens to me often. Too often to mention as a matter of fact, but here I am... 

      There you have it. Some little things that make me laugh, or hit close to home. Either way I sincerely hope they brought a smile to your face as well.

      Can you relate to any of these? Do you deal with difficult people throughout the day? 

W.P.I.- Anyone can make a great container garden. From simple to elaborate, the possibilities are limitless. Looking at pictures is a great way to get ideas for plant combinations, color schemes and interesting containers. Lately I've been perusing Pinterest for ideas like this...

      I love combining cute flowers with great vibrant color and different textures. When it comes to container gardening the possibilities are endless. 

      

Entertaining the Masses

One of my fave museums.

      "I'm tired," she says in a high pitched, whiny voice.

      Yes, that was me. Whining. But believe me when I say it is a good whine. I am tired, but it is from entertaining company. Which is a fun thing. :)

      At first it was the Charmed One's mother who came for a visit. She came in for a few days around Mother's Day. Then she ended up staying longer. Like a few weeks longer. But I didn't mind. I actually liked it. She did laundry, and cooked! A lot. So yes, we toted her around town, showing her the sights, having a merry ole time. She loved people watching, and I enjoyed hearing her funny stories about that when I got home from work. 

      My heart hurt a little when she went back to New York. But it didn't have time to hurt much. Last week the Charmed One's father called to announce they would be coming to town for a couple days. Enter this weekend.

      Now Dad 2 and his wife have been here a couple times. So they know a little about the history and vibe of this small city. We had to get creative. They had brought a friend with a bad foot, so walking wasn't an option. Their visit then became a personalized tour. The first night we met for dinner and sat for hours talking and reminiscing. The next day, however, we had all day.  We met for breakfast then piled into the car and took off. We toured the city, telling of our own observances and learnings, showing what we've come to know and love. 

      Then we left the city and headed toward Tybee Island. We chatted up the whole drive and eventually ended up at the Tybee Lighthouse. Although you could tour the lighthouse and on site buildings we opted not to. (This lighthouse is the one where I discovered I had a fear of heights.) We then traveled a little farther south and stopped at the main beach. The pier is a must, and everyone made their way there. We sat, talked, had ice cream, then left. It was a great time.

      Later we had a dinner date. Now it is 11:05 at night and I'm exhausted. Between work and company I'm worn out. But happy! I wouldn't trade any of it. :) I love this city, my work, and the company!

      What tires you out? Do you live at a tourist destination? How often do you see your family?

Facepalm Moments

    I sometimes struggle with my own personality flaws. I try to be a good, kind person. It’s just sometimes that little inner voice in me (I call her my other personality, er, She-devil) takes over. There are times when I witness something and I’ll try to make it a pleasurable time. Suddenly whamo, strange and funny thoughts run through my head. Before I know it that other personality chimes in and makes my kind thoughts turn to bad ones.

  For instance, I was working outside the other day. I was making some containers to liven up the deck and patio. I live in a pretty quiet neighborhood so I was enjoying the peaceful tranquility of the numerous birds and their songs. I often whistle back trying to make a conversation, but that is for another blog. I was putting the final touches on one container when I heard the unfamiliar sound of click clack, click clack. I straightened up and looked toward the road where the sound was coming from. To my surprise there were a handful of people riding horses down the road. The good me thought this was cool. How nice to be able to go out riding with friends. It just wasn’t something you see every day.

  Then one of the horses veered off the road and came down into my yard. At that moment She-devil took over. I watched as the woman rider tried to control the pretty horse. All my inner wicked personality could think was I hope that horse doesn’t mess up the yard. Then my thoughts went to, I hope that horse doesn’t relieve itself out there. I’m sure they would just keep going and leave me the mess. Then within seconds all I could envision is my dogs rolling in it. Ugh. So I kept watching this horse saunter across the yard and wonder why the woman on it isn’t leading it back up to the road. Well, then I witnessed her lifting a blue can to her lips. As she did she seemed to almost fall off of the back of the horse. She-devil shouts, OMG, she’s drunk! Only in the backwoods town that I live in. The poor horse can’t make it back to the road because the one with the reigns can’t see straight. After this incident that song “I’m From the Country,” by Tracy Byrd ran through my head. All.Day.Long.

  That same day I had weed wacked my yard. It took two hours. I had also sprayed the weeds. That took an hour. You see, my house sits on two acres. I thought having land was what I wanted. At the end of that day She-devil spoke again and said, what were you thinking? You’re not a spring chicken. How long do you think you can handle this? I came back to normal, sane, Kelly for just a second until that voice came back and said, oh well, you’re selling it soon. It’ll be alright!

  I had a two facepalm day that day. It happens often with me. I am just thankful that my inner self stays there most times. Otherwise I may have a permanent red palm print on my head because of it.

  Do you have an inner self that is not nice? What incidences have made you facepalm? 

Fashion Police

      I totally stepped into the 20teen's today. I'm probably a few years behind the times, but hey, I'm here now. Stop chuckling! I've never been into the latest clothes or anything. Most times the fashion police could throw me in jail. But not anymore!

      Today I took a stroll downtown. I had scoped out some shoes and decided to splurge a little. One of the sporting goods stores carried exactly what I wanted. I just hoped they had my size. We walked in and peered around until we saw them. Then I was drawn, like a moth to a light. The world around me turned into a blur. I had tunnel vision. (Thankfully there were no small children in my way! ;))

      Before I go any further I feel a need to explain why I wanted these shooz. You see, I work outdoors. I play with plants, so I either wear hiking boots or sneakers. With the weather in the 90s two things happen. One, my feet sweat. Two, I water said plants. Inevitably my feet get soaked in the process. And just recently I realized how much I hate it when my socks are soaked. And by hate it I mean I-can't-stand-it-to-the-point-I-want-to-rip-said-shoes-and-socks-off-and throw-them-away. Daily. It gives me the willies. 

      Today I hopefully put an end to the wet sock trauma. I bought a pair of these beauties...

      So, okay. They are not green. I flipped a coin and got the gray ones instead. They fit my ugly feet just a little bit better. I don't know how, they just did. :) Then I wore them out of the store and all around the city. :) I wanted to run fast and jump high and say, "Look at these, look at these!" 

      But I didn't. Charmed One may have had me committed if I had. 

      What kind of shoes do you wear to work? Do you wear flip-flops? Can you handle the tong between the toes? 

Back Porch Living

            Our long Spring has finally passed here in Savannah. That means that I’m pretty much done working five and six days a week. Phew. Notice that I used the words “pretty much” in that last sentence? Yeah. I think I may still have a couple more work weeks consisting of five-ten hour days. Call me crazy, but that’s just a feeling I get. ;)

            Don’t get me wrong. I’m not complaining. I love what I do. Its just I love my back porch more. J That’s where I’m chillaxin as we speak. It has become my sanctuary here in the little city. Many mornings I get up, make coffee, and head out on the back porch. I sit and take in the sounds of bird song, an occasional ship honking its horn, and nothing more. I love listening to the quiet. I take it all in, because I know within another hour or so that outer and inner peace will be gone. The hustle and bustle of the day begins.

            I sit out here now, around seven at night, and enjoy the quiet as well. Occasionally cars and people pass by. A blue jay screams in the distance. But I’m at peace. I watch the red mandevilla hanging basket blow in the breeze. I smell the citronella from the candle that burns next to me. Dang mosquito’s.

            See, the back porch makes my muscles relax. It heightens my senses. But best of all it just ROCKS! I’m waiting for a couple plants to grow a wee bit more before I show you some pictures. Soon.

            Do you have a place that makes you relax? What do you see or hear from your special place?